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Never confuse activity with productivity.

– Rick Warren

It is an unfortunate truth that a majority of the couples I counsel are at an absolute breaking point when we begin working together for marriage counseling. They have tried talking to each other, talking to family or friends, talking to someone at church. They have been reading relationship books, online articles, and some have even tried couples counseling before . . . all of which have failed. What I have come to learn over the years is that marriages don’t often end  due to a lack of couples actively trying to solve problems, they end because the actions taken don’t seem to produce results.

When two people enter into a relationship they bring their past along for the ride. After years of marriage that past also includes the wrongs they have committed against each other. With all of this lurking in the background jumping straight into marriage counseling without any ground work can quickly devolve into a professionally refereed rehashing of the same old arguments. This is because people all have hurts, resentment, grudges, and emotional walls that have built up over time. Trying to repair a marriage without first addressing those individual issues can feel a bit like bailing water out of a sinking boat. When you don’t see progress it’s hard not to consider giving up.

It is important to speak your mind in counseling. With that in mind I work hard to create a safe space for people to communicate their true feelings without judgement or criticism. However, what you say in the safety of the office may follow you all the way home. For this reason there are some things you just don’t feel comfortable saying out loud in front of your spouse.

When I work with couples I see each person individually first. This creates an opportunity to share thoughts, feelings, and emotions you might otherwise censor. It’s important to get these issues on the table and resolved as they are often the same issues that sabotage all of the other strategies that have ultimately failed. Tackling these in a one on one setting with your counselor will be more effective than you and your spouse attempting the emotional equivalent of a three-legged race. The individual work could be as short as a single session, or could go longer. In my experience, the majority of couples find that 3 to 5 sessions has them ready to transition into couples work with a positive outlook.

So if you’re thinking about marriage counseling I recommend you consider doing a bit of individual work first. There is really no wrong way to go about it. Some couples find that seeing three separate professionals (his, hers, and ours) works well. Other couples might decide on working exclusively with one professional so they don’t have to retell their story. I personally find this method most effective. It also gives the counselor the ability to pick up on themes and patterns in the individual work that can later be applied in marriage counseling. Either way, it makes sense to patch any holes in the boat before you start bailing water. The results will come quicker, and as you see results you will be encouraged to follow through and achieve genuine lasting change in your relationship.

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icon David M.

Bryan is an expert who understands how to break down and get to the root of an issue, and his strategies and approach were immensely helpful for my family. Above all, he truly cares about his patients and helps them. I cannot recommend him highly enough!

icon Lauren C.

I highly recommend Bryan for individual and couples therapy. He always made me feel comfortable and I felt like I could be myself which is super important when going to counseling.

icon Alan B.

In my time in Florida, I had the opportunity to work alongside Bryan in helping families and I believe him to be of high integrity and care with his patients. He demonstrates great knowledge of what each client needs and doesn't just care about the psychology behind the issues the clients face, but deeply cares about the patients. Long-term health is always the goal Bryan seeks to attain for each client. There are few counselors who care about their patients the way Bryan does. I would, and have, recommend him to any family or individual struggling with the issues life brings.

icon Tessa L.

I met with Bryan for about 8 months. I began meeting with him individually (for about 5 months) and for the final 3 months, my partner and I went together. We cannot be any more emphatic when we say that our experience with Bryan was wonderful.

Bryan demonstrates a superb level of care and commitment to his clients. He fosters an environment of openness, honesty, and acceptance that allows clients to confront their flaws and limitations in order to heal and make changes for the better. It is clear that Bryan is in this profession for all the right reasons and is gifted as a counselor. I would strongly recommend him to anyone.

Thank you Bryan!

icon Brett L.

To put it simply Bryan is a superstar! Yes, he is an excellent therapist...I have several family members and friends who have been referred to him, and he is absolutely wonderful. He has and uses a Christian foundation with his counseling and has a calm, pleasant demeanor that puts his patients at ease. He is insightful with his approach to therapy and I would recommend him to any colleague, friend, or patient without reservation.

icon Ashley M.

I started working with Bryan 7 months prior to writing this review. I went alone in hopes that he could help with some relationship issues I was unable to solve on my own. Bryan has been nothing short of a miracle in my life. My story is still being written, but I look forward to my appointments with him. He is calm, kind-hearted, and genuinely wants me to succeed. He looks at every angle and gives guidance/suggestions that only betters my situation. Bryan is extremely intelligent and knows how to help people. Better than that he enjoys helping people. I will continue to refer him to anyone and everyone. True companionate people are not just hard to find but he does with the intent of actually building his patients up. I can not say enough great things about him, and strongly recommend him to anyone in need.

icon Maria F.

My husband and I met with Bryan for about 5 months. The time and money we spent were without a doubt, one of the very best investments we have made for our marriage. The care and commitment with which Bryan treats his clients are outstanding. He patiently, kindly, and honestly helps clients understand situations or wounds with clarity to which he offers sound and concrete steps towards healing. Bryan helped my husband and I to grow as individuals as well as together as a couple, and our marriage was strengthened tremendously.

After our marriage counseling concluded, I continued to meet with Bryan individually for about 3 months. Bryan helped me to understand my need for a better relationship with God which sent me on a journey that completely changed my life. I continue to live with the same struggles (from an incurable medical issue) yet I no longer suffer from the debilitating depression it used to cause me. I will never be able to adequately thank Bryan for the gift his counseling gave me and my marriage.

I would highly recommend Bryan to anyone.

Thank you, Bryan!

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